1) Look at the tone of the opening scene. After the bits of exposition (I wonder if that first paragraph could have been placed elsewhere), Mr. Abbot depicts suburban bliss. What’s more comforting than a father watching his daughters play in the snow? (And with their new dog!) That tone is interrupted when the woman emerges from the car. After this moment, things take a darker turn. The contrast in tone helps to hook the reader.
2) The author does a good job selecting details. I like the white dog; it makes me think of peace and purity. I like that the girls’ coats are “designer.” Just that one word adds a lot of meaning.
3) I like the name “Trey” for the character. In case you didn’t know, “Trey” is a name or nickname that is common in aristocratic families, the kinds of people who are likely to pass down names to their children. Trey was a legacy admission at Yale…sounds pretty upper-class to me!
3 Comments
P.K.Abbot
Thanks for your interest in my book, “Blood Contest.”
Your comments about the opening page are very perceptive, and much appreciated by me.
When I wrote this book, I struggled with the idea of keeping the first paragraph of exposition as the opening paragraph. The opening chapter could have easily survived without it, but the idea of fortunate people — people who operate in a different world and who live by a different set of rules than the rest of us — is a central part of the book’s story.
For that reason, I started the book with the sentence, “Trey Jamieson was a very fortunate man.” I chose to come back to that idea in the final sentence of the first chapter, and again in the final sentence of the book’s epilogue.
In a way, that idea brought the first chapter and the entire book full circle — to their completion.
That’s why I decided to open the book with that paragraph of exposition.
Thank you again for your interest in my book. I appreciate your comments, and I wish you the best in your endeavors.
P. K. Abbot
Allison Rhodes
P.K. –
I am glad you enjoyed my mini review. I love that you point out how writers make choices that require trade-offs. I never negatively judge another writer in the context of my site or social media presence; I just like thinking about the thought process that we endure as we make those choices.
I think other writers will benefit from reading your thought process with respect to your choice!
Thrive,
Allison
P.K.Abbot
Hi Allison,
I never took your comment as a negative judgment on my writing. In fact, when I read your comment about the first paragraph of exposition, I remembered that I had the identical thought while writing that first chapter.
I enjoyed reading your other mini-reviews too. Keep up the good work.
Cheers.
P. K. Abbot